


Sour Lemons

by asmaanixx



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, M/M, Post Season 5, mentions of Shiro
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-10
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2019-03-29 16:19:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13930731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asmaanixx/pseuds/asmaanixx
Summary: Keith let out a deep sigh and felt himself fill with dread. He was the last person Lance needed right now and yet… his mom was right. He had to apologize for the way he acted before things soured even more between them.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> I have published a piece on here after quite some time so it could be rusty. Hopefully, the story is able to still shine through. I may add another chapter to it, I'm not entirely sure though. We'll see.
> 
> This has also been written as a thank you piece to all my followers at theklancecollection.tumblr.com. Thank you everyone for letting me reach 3k. You all are seriously the best! :)
> 
> I hope you enjoy the piece. ^_^

"What are you saying?" Keith crossed his arms, and truly tried to understand what the Red Paladin was trying to tell him. But no matter how much he tried, there was an intrinsic part of Keith that refused to believe Lance’s words. His former default reaction of being immediately angered and irritated by the other boy’s statements was resting on the tip of his tongue, and he wasn’t able to keep it down as well as he wanted to.

“Keith, I’m not lying!” Lance pleaded. “There’s something very wrong with Shiro.”

Keith’s fingers dug deep into his biceps as his brows scrunched downwards. There it was again. That ugly knot forming in his stomach and poisoning every coherent thought.

“And it’s been like that ever since you brought him back.” Lance added in a small voice. His own hands were crossed as he held onto himself tightly. Almost as if he didn’t have anyone else to rely on but himself.

“Lance.” Keith bit out, using every ounce in his body to not shout at the boy. “This has been a very stressful time for everyone. _Especially_ Shiro. He has been captured by the Galra, tortured, experimented and…” Keith paused to prevent the crack in his voice from coming through. “And who knows what else.” He spat. This was good. He can channel all the anger he was feeling towards Lance onto the Galra. “If there’s anyone who should be given a pass for their behavior, then it’s Shiro.”

“Keith, but…”

“But what Lance!” Keith snapped making the Red Paladin flinch and take a step back. “What do you want me to say? That Shiro is not Shiro? That _I_ was not able to tell the difference between the real and the fake?” Keith took a step forward, Lance took one back. “That _I’m_ the one who brought in a possible Galran spy? That _I’m_ the one who planted a ticking time bomb who will take down Voltron?” Keith ignored the defensive manner in which Lance had extended his hands, and shook them. “I’m his _friend_ Lance! I’ve known him longer than any of you put together so believe me when I say there is nothing wrong with Shiro!” Keith screamed.

Chest heaving, face heated and probably red, Keith tried to calm down. He didn’t return to the Castle to engage in another useless fight with Lance.  He had hoped to use this opportunity as a way of reconnecting with everyone, especially now that he had gotten his mother back. Lord knows, he could have used their help in mending his relationship with her.

But Lance?

Keith clenched his fist. He didn’t know _why_ he made things so difficult for him. No matter how many times he tried to make things right with them, Lance always found a way to screw things up.

“Keith, I know all that and I’m not saying you will try to sabotage us on purpose! But you _have_ to believe me when I say there’s something not right. When we were in the Voltron mind palace, Shiro, _our_ Shiro reached out to me. He was trying to say something but I don’t know what it was. Keith, please.” Keith pulled his hand away when Lance tried to reach out for it. The knot in his stomach was becoming truly ugly. “You can go ask Shiro. Even he admitted to not feeling right. He doesn’t even remember being with us when we connected!”

“What’s your point Lance? You can’t even remember what ‘our Shiro’,” Keith air-quoted, “was trying to say. You don’t even have anyone else to back you up. Why should I even believe you over him?”

Keith dug his nails deeper into the meaty flesh of his palms. He could not let himself go weak just because Lance was crying. There is no room for emotions when it comes to life and death matters such as this. If he were to believe Lance, he needed solid proof other than his words.

“Because I’ve never lied to you before Keith.” Lance’s voice broke, piercing shards into Keith’s heart. “I-I don’t know what else to say. It’s my gut or…” He waved a hand, uselessly in the air. “Something. I don’t know how to explain it but I just know it.”

“Maybe you’re scared.” Keith offered instead. He knew he was going to be hitting hard with this one, but it’s the best possible explanation he can give for Lance’s erratic behavior.

“What?” Lance whispered.

“I don’t know Lance, so much has been changing around here. Maybe you’re just scared of being kicked off the team again. Or it’s just your insecurities talking again.” Keith shrugged, not even believing the words coming out of his own mouth. “Maybe you’re worried about your place on the team since Shiro isn’t giving you any brownie points.”

“Keith, that’s not true!” Lance clipped, his voice being oddly firm compared to his previous proclamations. “I would _never_ do something like this to Shiro just because of…” Lance trailed off, feeling too disgusted to even finish the thought.

“Then maybe you want his place.” Even Keith didn’t expect that. “We all know how badly you wanted to be the Black Paladin. And now that you’ve gotten a new weapon from your bayard, maybe you think you have a nice, real shot at being a leader.”

The harsh skin on skin contact shut Keith up. It took him a moment to realize Lance had slapped him. His right cheek felt incredibly hot, and he could feel tears forming at the corner of his eyes. He swallowed, letting the loud ding in his ears to dissipate before he reacted. When he looked back at Lance, he didn’t know what to think of the Cuban’s shocked expression nor the slow lowering of his assaulting hand.

“K-Keith, I-”

“Get out.” Keith snarled.

If there was any force out there that listened to Keith’s pleas, he wished with every fiber of his being that it would listen to him now and make Lance go away.

“No, Keith, I-”

“GO. **_NOW!_** ”

Startled, Lance scampered away from Keith's room.

Even Keith didn’t know from where all that rage came from but now he was seeing red.

 _Lance_ had the audacity to slap _him_? _HIM_?

Yelling, Keith punched the wall that was located just behind where Lance was standing. He didn’t care that he had used enough force to put a dent in it.

Keith didn’t care that Lance used to consider them as rivals. In an odd way, he used to take pleasure in those interactions. With his silly jokes and competitions, Keith always remained on his toes. He had an intimate reason to do better than not only Lance but to beat out his personal scores too.

Keith yelled and punched again, his hand going deeper into the wall.

When Shiro went missing, he was genuinely touched by Lance’s behavior towards him. Those silly little banters were gone and replaced with a sincere want for Keith to be okay. For him to be mentally, physically and emotionally well. Keith hadn’t known how to respond to that. Worst of all, he hadn’t known how to be there for Lance when he came for help.

Pulling his hand out, he slumped down onto his bed, cradling his sore wrist.

Keith still agonizes over the words he spoke that day because he _knows_ he could have done better. He doesn’t know exactly how, but he knows he could have said something wiser to alleviate Lance’s fears. Truthfully, anything would have been better than, “Leave the math to Pidge.”

If he had, then they wouldn’t have had to see this day. Lance wouldn’t be chasing down the wrong rabbit hole and he wouldn’t be so hurt.

“Keith?”

Keith looked up as the swishing doors revealed his mother. Keith immediately stood up and centered himself in the middle of the room, cradling and hiding his injured hand behind his back.

“Oh for goodness’ sake, you don’t have to pull that shit with me.” Krolia dismissed with a roll of her eyes. Walking into her son’s room, she inspected the place, not that there was much to see in the first place. She raised a brow when her eyes landed on the gigantic hole in the wall. “You renovating?”

“No.” Groaning, Keith took his seat back on the bed and watched his hand shake. There was no point in putting up an act of bravery when his mother could see right through him. With an audible sigh, Krolia nudged Keith aside so that he would make room for her.

“May I?” She gestured at the shaking hand.

Keith nodded, not entirely sure as to how she was going to make it any better. Gingerly, as if he were still a little baby, Krolia held Keith’s hand and felt for any broken bones. An odd sensation coursed through Keith’s veins. He had always imagined what it would feel like to be held by his mother, but now that it was actually happening, he felt so distant. He didn’t know what to do to make this vast space go away.

“Well, luckily there’s nothing broken.” His mother informed. “It’ll still hurt like a bitch though.” Keith raised his brows in surprise. Krolia laughed. “Your father taught me quite a lot during my time on Earth.”

Keith felt something warm bloom inside his chest. He felt quite anxious, and had many questions resting on the tip of his tongue. How did she first come to Earth? How did she meet his dad? How did they fall in love? What are some of the things that they used to do? Did they ever fight? If they did, how did they make up? What’s her favorite place on Earth? Favorite food? Favorite drink? Favorite music? But most of all, why did she leave?

Staying at Blade of Marmora never gave them the time to connect as they needed to. Always being whisked away for a mission here, a debriefing there - there just was never enough _time_. That’s why Keith had decided to come back to the Castle. It was the perfect opportunity to reconnect with the Paladins, introduce his mom, figure out how to proceed with Lotor being the new Emperor amongst so much more. But now… now he wondered if it was even worth it. All he ended up doing was hurting himself and maybe a friend? His relationship with Lance had been complicated enough, it didn’t need to get any more complicated.

“The Princess told me that the materials used within the Castle are one of the strongest elements known to the universe.” Krolia spoke, caressing his hand.

“Give or take ten thousand years.” Keith mumbled.

Krolia smiled in amusement. “Regardless, I’m surprised you were able to do that to the walls with your bare hands. Especially given the fact you’re not even a full Galra.” She rubbed a thumb across his knuckles. “Something must have really upset you. Do you want to talk about it?”

Feeling exhausted, he laid his head against her shoulder. It was an incredibly intimate action he had never expected himself to execute before, least of all with his mother. She must have felt the same trepidation for it took a few minutes for her shoulders to relax and her head to tilt over so that it was pressing softly against her son’s.

“Lance slapped me.” Keith immediately regretted his blunt, yet honest words. He wanted to tell her the truth and be able to bond with her, but was throwing Lance under the bus worth it?

Krolia’s jaw clenched and for a brief moment, Keith could sincerely say he could hear her teeth grind against each other. “Do you want me to talk to him?” She bit out.

“No.” He may not know his newly found mother all too well, but he knew her well enough to know she would be using her fists more and words less.

“I don’t like him.”

“You don’t even know him.”

“He hit you. That’s more than enough for me to not like him.” Krolia huffed.

Despite himself, Keith smiled in amusement. It was a typical motherly move.

“He’s not bad.” Keith’s not entirely sure why he was defending Lance given the shit he just pulled. He just knew he didn’t want Lance to get a bad reputation before he even had the chance to know his mother. “Things are just… difficult at the moment.”

“And his solution was to hit you?” Apparently Krolia wasn’t going to have any of Keith’s apologies. “Look Keith, I may not be knowledgeable to Earth’s ways, but Galran’s don’t stand for this type of behavior. If this person doesn’t have the capabilities of speaking to you in a rational manner, then there are no hopes to be had with them. Do you… understand what I’m saying?”

“No…” Keith admitted. “You lost me at the end.”

With a sigh, Krolia tried again. “If someone were to ever hit me, I wouldn’t sit back quietly. They would get it back loud and clear. And if it was someone whom I loved-”

“I don’t love Lance!” Keith corrected, quickly sitting up straight.

“Did I say you did?” Krolia scanned Keith’s face for any telltale signs of him lying.

“Well, no… it’s just that you said…” Scooting towards the middle of the bed, he locked his arms around his knees.

“I was teaching you a little something about myself Keith.” Krolia clarified, tucking a leg underneath her. “But if there is something you wish to say…” She purposely trailed off giving her son the opportunity to pick up the thread and carry it whichever he wanted.

He wanted to tell her about Lance but he didn’t know where to begin. His relationship with rest of the Paladins is pretty straightforward. They’re all his teammates, who became his first real close friends after Shiro. Allura and Coran… well, yeah, they’re aliens but they too became someone whom he came to rely upon when situations got tough.

But then there’s Lance. There’s always something about Lance that stands out differently from the rest and honestly, Keith has no idea how to decipher it. It had been easy to label their relationship as reluctant, bickering teammates. The past few months however, turned everything upside down. If only Lance hadn’t been so kind and compassionate. If only he had reluctant and wary in his approaches like everyone else had, it would have been easy for Keith to read him.

“Keith sweety,” Krolia surprised him when she placed a hand on his knee, “What’s wrong?” She asked softly as she wiped away a tear.

Crying? Keith was crying? Since when did that happen?

He hugged himself tighter and let the tears flow. If that’s what his body needed at the moment, then who was he to stop it.

He allowed his body to be shifted around so that his mother could wrap her arms around him and give him a hug. He cried harder for he now _had_ a mother who would hug him. He had a mother who would wipe away his tears and offer solutions. He had someone who would love him unconditionally and do anything and everything to protect him from all harm, even the ones he himself may have caused.

“Mom…” He didn’t care how badly his voice cracked. He could _finally_ use the term as much as he wanted and as long as he wanted. He can say it in as many different ways and in many different tones and intonations. He has a _mom_ now. “Mom.” He cried harder and let his mom hug him as tightly as she wanted. He didn’t care that her hugs were pressing hard into his ribs. He didn’t care about the purple bruising that could show up. His _mom_ was hugging him. His mom was right here with him.

“I’m right here Keith. Tell me what’s wrong.” She kissed him on the top of his head, wishing desperately he would open up his heart and allow himself to be taken care of.

“I think I fucked up with Lance.” He spoke around a hiccup. Wiping away some of his tears, he tried to reign in some of his emotions so that he can explain himself properly. “He came to me wanting to talk. It was a whole bunch of nonsense but I said some things and then he hit me and now I…”

“Keith,” His mom spoke sternly, “if you want me to help you, you have to give me better answers than all this wishy-washy nonsense.”

Swallowing, Keith nodded. He should have known better. His mom would have an objective view on the situation. She’ll be able to tell who’s at fault more accurately than he would.

Taking a deep breath, he tried again. “Lance told him he has some doubts about Shiro.” Krolia’s ears perked at this. Whatever it was, she probably wasn’t expecting this. “He thinks there’s something not right with him. Like, he’s not himself.”

“Any particular reason why he came to that conclusion?”

“No.” Keith mumbled, feeling stupid at even mentioning this. “He listed it off as a gut feeling.”

“Keith.” Krolia urged.

With a roll of his eyes, he told her about the Voltron mindscape and how Lance had felt the ‘real’ Shiro’s presence, how the Shiro they have right now couldn’t remember any sort of connection and how he too had expressed not feeling quite like himself.

“But all this is just conjecture. It doesn’t actually _mean_ anything.” Keith let out in a huff.

“Are you saying this with fully certainty or because you don’t want to be in the wrong?” Krolia inquired.

“What do you mean?”

“Keith,” She exhaled, “You told me you’re the one who brought Shiro back home. If it turns out he’s not who he says he is, who do you think will take this news the hardest?” Keith remained quiet. “As the Black Paladin, the Leader of Voltron, you brought home a possible weapon of mass destruction. You, who claim to have known this person for an incredibly long time, got fooled by his looks and mannerisms and allowed your brain to be tricked into believing he is the real deal.”

“Mom…”

“Let me finish Keith.” She cut him off with a raised hand. “This is the _Galra_ that we’re talking about. An empire who have a Druid at their disposal. A _witch_ who can do the impossible. Last time they had him, they cut off his arm put in one of their own. Who knows what they did this time around.”

“That’s not true!” Keith argued, choosing to get off the bed and pace around instead. “I would have known if there was something wrong with him.”

“How?” His mother followed suit. “You’ve been with the Blade of Marmora for _months_. How could you have possibly known what goes on around here? Keith,” She placed a hand on his shoulder to let her words fully sink in, “If there is even a shred of possibility that your friend could be right, you have to take the lead and investigate it. It’s better to have this dealt with now than to regret it later. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

With slumped shoulders, Keith nodded.

“I know it’s not a pretty thing to think about, but we have to take all precautions.”

“I know, it’s just,” Keith crossed his arms, “I feel even more like a jackass.”

“Because of your friend?” Krolia asked with a tilt of her head.

“Yeah.” He mumbled.

“Then go apologize.” Krolia chuckled, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Keith crossed his arms tighter and pouted.

“Go before it’s too late.” Krolia simply could not stop herself from mussing up his hair and laughing. “I’m pretty sure he would like a friend’s company right now.”

Keith let out a deep sigh and felt himself fill with dread. He was the _last_ person Lance needed right now and yet… his mom was right. He had to apologize for the way he acted before things soured even more between them.

With a warm smile and a tight hug, he thanked his mom. Needless to say, she had initially been startled by the action, not fully accustomed to having little people randomly hug her. But she soon wrapped her own arms around him and give a reassuring squeeze.

After all, they know all too well that things may take time, but they eventually set themselves right.


	2. Chapter 2

He fucked up.

There was no other way to put it. Lance crossed all the lines today and there was no turning back. His role as being second-in-command to Shiro’s leadership; his amicable and intrinsic connection with the Paladins; the mystical force which ran through Voltron; his confusing yet intimate relationship with Keith… tonight, Lance broke all his bonds with a single slap to the face. He couldn’t see a rational manner in which he could rectify the broken alliances.

He curled tighter into a ball and squeezed his eyes extra tight. He had been repeating the same action for the past fifteen minutes like an idiot in the hopes that something would change but it never did. The past, unfortunately, was the only fixed point in Lance’s life and acted as a reminder as to why Lance was a major screw up.

The fact remained he went to Keith with his doubts because he had hoped that out of all the people on board the ship, he would be the one to listen to him. If not agree with his statements, then at least hear him out and shake away his negative thinking. Like he did last time… not what he did tonight…

His loud sobs bounced around the dark walls of his room. The only consolation they brought was that they were useful in drowning out Keith’s accusatory words.

Ironically, some part of Lance had known his thoughts on Shiro were stupid. After all, like Keith said,  he had no solid proof to back up his claims other than his gut feeling and what he vaguely remembered. It was silly and he had spent countless nights staying up later than what’s necessary pondering over what it could all mean.

Is the real Shiro still out there? If so, then where is he? Is he even alive or is he still captured by the Galra? If the Shiro that they have is a fake, then why hasn’t he done something by now? Surely he could have murdered all the Paladins many times over. Moreover, why did he let Zarkon die? If he had been planted during his reign, then wouldn’t his aim be to keep the Emperor alive? Or had his mission always been to put Lotor on the throne? But that can’t be right. There had been no way of knowing who would have won the fight between Lotor and Zarkon. Or that there would have been a fight at all.

Groaning, Lance straightened himself out on his bed and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyelids. He did  _ not _ need to stress himself over this. As Keith pointed out, he’s being a nuisance right now. Stirring up trouble where it’s not needed. Things were  _ finally _ beginning to look good for the universe. Planets were freed, species were being treated with the respect they deserved, and many of the individuals were allowed to go back home. The last thing they needed was to put a wrench in the whole thing just because Fuck-Up-Lance didn’t know how to shut his big, fat mouth up.

Lance didn’t know why he wasn’t able to let the matter drop. It wasn’t like he hated Shiro. Heck, he had worshipped the guy back when he was in the Garrison. Shiro’s work ethic, his ambition, charm, and ability to balance his personal matters with the professional - they all had inspired Lance immensely as a young cadet. If there was anyone whose footsteps Lance had wanted to follow, it was him - Shiro the hero. His hero.

If he was being quite honest with himself, Lance never imagined he would get to meet his idol let alone protect the universe alongside him. Let alone the fact he rescued his unconscious body from the Garrison, but the fact he held a conversation with him, heard his voice, had his words directed at him, and then had the opportunity to shake his hand, even if it was an alien prosthetic - it had all been surreal. There was a part of Lance which kept whispering to him to be grateful for all that he has gotten thus far because Lord knew he didn’t deserve it.

Frankly speaking, Lance didn’t think he deserved any of this. The glory and fame of being a Defender of the Known Universe, getting the chance to work alongside some of the most powerful individuals - Keith, Shiro, Pidge, Hunk, Allura, heck even Coran contributed more to the missions than he did. He had knowledge about species Lance could never have; knew how to speak in more tongues than Lance can count and has more charm than Lance could ever hope to have.

And what did Lance have?

He wasn’t smart at math or technology like Pidge. He couldn’t re-configure alien resources to make them useful to the team like Hunk could. There was no way he could run the Castle and make it jump through wormholes like Allura. Heck, he didn’t even know Blue had secret powers and he had piloted her far longer than Allura had! And Shiro… well, Shiro was irreplaceable. No one could take his place. He simply had an innate ability to keep the team together under dire situations. Only he knew how to bring out everyone’s strengths and quietly work on their weaknesses as rest of the Paladins had the tendency of getting too caught up in pointing out what went wrong first versus what they did right.

And then there was Keith.

Tossing over to the side, Lance curled up into a fetus position.

Lance didn’t need to be reminded by how he would never amount to the same levels of achievement as the mullet-donning man. From the days of the Garrison to their adventures as the Paladins of Voltron, there had always been an inexplicable distance between the two and no matter how hard Lance tried, he couldn’t close it.

Lance absolutely hated himself for thinking this way, but he supposed if there was one good thing to come out of Shiro’s absence, it had been the fact Keith and he were able to get a little closer. Granted it was Lance who had first stopped antagonizing Keith with his silly little jokes and pranks, but an effort had been made from Keith’s side too. He had accepted Lance’s help and heeded his advice. There had been an equal level of respect from both the Paladins as they very well knew that the situation they had found themselves in was like no other. With the Leader of Voltron missing, the entire Universe had been put at stake. Their Lions could have been easily stolen, the Castle attacked, the Paladins could have died…

Lance clutched his chest.

He knew full well the thought of Shiro possibly being dead had swirled through everyone’s minds but they purposely chose not to dwell on it. If they had entertained the idea, even for the briefest of moments that someone whom they knew and trusted to lead them into some of the most strenuous battles had just died, well, it would have become all too real. All of a sudden, mortality would have become something tangible that anyone could have lost.

So they continued to deceive themselves and Lance became the biggest fool of them all.

He gripped the fabric of his t-shirt as if it would somehow stop the sharp tugs pulling at his heart.

If only Shiro hadn’t gone missing. If only he had returned with rest of the Paladins, then Lance wouldn’t have tricked himself into believing that he could have had something more with Keith. He wouldn’t have eased himself into a false security of thinking that he actually belonged with rest of the team. He wouldn’t have thought he provided something useful when all he did was be a huge hindrance.

The only thing he was good at was shooting and even that proved to be useless in the training room. When faced against so many enemy soldiers, his long range guns would have yielded him and his companions dead. It was no wonder his bayard had to give itself an upgrade.

Abruptly sitting up, Lance inhaled sharp breaths.

Useless. That’s all he was. A complete and utter failure. Just another liability who would get all his teammates killed.

He ripped at his hairs, ignoring the shooting pain that coursed through the end of his scalp. His eyes were surely puffy and bloodshot, his face drenched in a mixture of snot and tears and yet Lance couldn’t find it within him to care. His whole life he chased after the dreams of perfection. The perfect job, the perfect legacy, the perfect love, the perfect family. Everything in his life needed to be written down by the celestial beings themselves so that there was no room for error. But now, sitting here in a dark, windowless room, millions of light years away from the only place he called home - he couldn’t give a fuck about how he looked or what people thought of him. They already had a low opinion of him. How much more damage could a little more negative thinking do?

Wiping his nose against the sleeve of his jacket, Lance slowly climbed out of bed. It took him a few minutes to get adjusted on his wobbly legs, but once he did, he found his way to the door through the darkness.

He didn’t think much as to where he was headed. Simply followed where his legs led him.

Lance wasn’t entirely sure what to do when he came to stand in front of Red. With Blue it was easy. She was able to pick up on his feelings without him even having to explain himself. Frankly, he was a bit scared of Blue as she would hone in and make him confront emotions and issues which he had buried deep inside. He didn’t hate her, or anything. It was just that he didn’t know how to deal with her unconditional love and support. Blue simply had a way of understanding and giving him the warmth, security and comfort that he needed. In a way, she reminded Lance of his mother. With Blue around, he didn’t feel so far away from home. After all, they both did come from Earth.

With Red, it was the opposite. No matter what the other Paladins said, Red was not his Lion. She didn’t open up to him first nor did she choose him as her Paladin. She belonged with Keith and will always be his. Lance is merely warming his spot. He knew he’ll have to give way the day Keith chose to come back - and regardless of what Keith said that day will come.

That’s not to say Lance didn’t try to bond with Red. He did, but she didn’t respond in the same manner that Blue did. Lance wasn’t entirely sure if resistance was coming merely from his side or hers as well, but he felt a tension between the two. It was as if their alliance is a temporary truce. A relationship that is meant to be short lived until everything else fell into place. Lance knew Red will always be second-in-command to Black. Lance also knew that the only person best suited in the second-in-command position to Shiro’s leadership was Keith. Lance had no place in that relationship.

With Keith, he might have had a chance in growing but with Shiro, Lance felt stuck. He doesn’t mean to find fault in Shiro’s leadership skills, but with the amount of times he’s been shot down and made to feel less than inadequate - he’s not too sure if he has what it takes to be a Defender of the Universe. Of course he has gotten into arguments with Keith when he used to be the Black Paladin but at least Keith had the decency of pointing out where Lance’s thinking was at fault. In all their fights, Keith provided the opportunity for Lance to learn and grow. Shiro however, didn’t give that chance. Lance would get yelled at, be shunned out of strategic meetings, or simply ignored when he made suggestions.

It was certainly a very odd behavior as the Shiro they knew simply didn’t behave that way. When Lance had pointed this out to Hunk, he made the point of bringing up Shiro’s torture. The Paladins simply have no way of knowing the type of damage the Galrans inflicted upon him. Even if they do, they can never understand the depths of his pain and trauma. Shiro’s tendency to have the final say and more controlling nature simply may be his way of coping with what happened to him.

Lance had certainly given the time to mull over Hunk’s and had tried to be more understanding of Shiro’s situation. He even limited his jokes, and overall interactions with rest of the Paladins - choosing instead to work on his faults. It wasn’t much of a surprise when Lance found out the team hadn’t noticed his absence. Hunk and Pidge certainly got a lot done without Lance’s incessant babbling distracting them from their work.

Still, Lance didn’t hate them. In fact, he loved and appreciated them all the more because he knew for a fact that the Universe would be safe in their hands. It certainly would be a lot safer than if he was at the helm.

Lance took a step forward but was pushed back. His eyes widened in horror. There was a force field put up around Red. Lance swallowed thickly. He dragged his gaze towards Blue - she too had a force field up. So did Black, Yellow and Green.

“R-Red.”

There was no response.

“Blue?”

Nothing.

There wasn’t even a faint whisper of their essence. There was absolute silence.

Lance stumbled back.

His worst nightmares has been proven true. He wasn’t a Paladin. He’s not a Defender of the Universe. He has no place - not at home on Earth; not even in outer space. He doesn’t deserve to shine amongst the stars. He’s the space in between - the darkness which is ignored. The void which is filled up with resourceful, bright and intelligent entities.

With leaden steps, Lance made his way out of the hangar. He had no reason to be there anymore. He was merely a floating asteroid, waiting to find its designated crashing spot.

Apparently that spot happened to be the middle of the Castle corridor as Lance dropped with a heavy thud.


End file.
